Until one is committed, there is hesitancy...

So, I maybe drifting, I'm not really sure what I am doing any more, why put in all this effort and why hold on? For What? Dr B. read this to me during my session this morning, it made me cry and I've been left thinking about it....

“Until one is committed, there is hesitancy, 

The chance to draw back.

Concerning all acts of initiative (and creation), 

There is one elementary truth, 

The ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans: 

That the moment one definitely commits oneself, 

Then Providence moves too. 

All sorts of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred. 

A whole stream of events issues from the decision, 

Raising in one's favour all manner of unforeseen incidents,

And meetings and material assistance, 

Which no man could have dreamed would have come his way. 

Whatever you can do, or dream you can do, 

Begin it. 

Boldness has genius, power, and magic in it. 

Begin it now.”

Until we TRULY commit to recovery, until we TRULY commit to freedom, peace, to MORE we never TRULY know what we are capable of. But to what and to whom am I committed? 

That's what I need to figure out now. To stop the wandering and drifting. 

I'm committed to recovery, committed to going to clinic, but WHAT am I committed to achieving, what am I trying to do, where am I going and who will I be? Do I need to have more boldness. To let go of EVERYTHING? I think I know the answer, and I guess you do too....